Three
Waves of Initiation
By Kiara Windrider, June 8, 2005
I sit by the sea watching the waves
come in. A big wave crests and breaks,
sweeping in over the thirsty sand. Then
it pulls back, creating a rush of
turbulence as it confronts the next wave
on its way in. Soon this next wave
breaks past the turbulence, and sweeps
in again towards the shore. Forward and
back, flowing and ebbing, the ocean’s
dance continues into infinity.
I reflect on the process of change.
Some weeks ago I was speaking with my
friend Barry Martin, who used the
metaphor of the Three Waves to refer to
the process of planetary awakening.
Sitting here watching the incessant
movement of the ocean in front of me, I
am reminded of this conversation.
Whenever a new project begins there
is always a great enthusiasm and energy
that accompanies it. This is the First
Wave. It is strong and exhilarating. We
are caught up in a vision. We feel the
power of the universe moving through
us. We feel we can break through all
seeming resistance. A great power
surges through us, and we are sure we
can endure anything in the fulfillment
of this vision.
Then comes the second wave, the
“backwave”, as the ocean inevitably
pulls back towards itself. There is a
great turbulence. It is a time of
testing and agony. We watch helplessly
as our fondest hopes and dreams begin to
collapse all around us. The universe
suddenly seems to have forgotten all
about us, or even seems to have turned
against us. We wonder if we have been
given a false vision, or if the universe
makes any sense anymore.
Many call this the “dark night of the
soul”. Before a person actually
experiences this, there is always a
romantic notion attached to this. We
are told that an initiation will be
coming, and that this “dark night” is
the passage to a great awakening, the
gateway to a spiritual rebirth. We even
begin to secretly pray for this, feeling
quite ready for the challenge, foolishly
certain that we will make it through, no
matter what.
The problem is that when we are in
the First Wave, we only experience the
rush of infinite divine possibility. We
have received the “deeksha”. We have
had our first taste of enlightenment.
We have caught our first vision of an
imminent Golden Age. We have seen the
big picture where all the world’s
problems have been miraculously solved.
We have glimpsed a hope deep in our
psyche that spells freedom from a
lifetime of despair and suffering. We
have fallen in love with the infinite
possibilities of being.
Then comes the “reality check”. The
Second Wave hits us, and everything is
suddenly going backwards. All our
dreams suddenly dissolve in the foam.
No longer are we experiencing divine
ecstasy. We find ourselves being
pounded into the sand and churned around
by the universe until all that is left
is a blind sense of betrayal and
despair.
Eventually the Third Wave breaks
through this sense of soul pounding, and
we enter into an altogether new realm of
mastery. The last remnants of the ego’s
attachment to separation dissolve, and
we are free. But how do we get from
here to there?
I have spoken with many who are going
through a “dark night of the soul” some
weeks or months after receiving the
“deeksha”, and have also been
experiencing this myself over the past
few months. It has given me an
opportunity to reflect more deeply about
these things, and I would like to offer
some perspectives. There are certain
characteristics of this “dark night”
that many of us have experienced in
common:
- loads of “shit” happening all at
once
- feeling totally overwhelmed by
life
- a plunge of self-esteem
- feelings of betrayal, despair,
helplessness
- loss of any certainties or hope
- no feeling of divine connection
- feeling isolated in a private
hell
From time to time I discover that
there are certain things I can do while
being mercilessly buffeted into the
sand. I breathe into the fear. I take
time out where I can scream or cry or
pray or just be quiet. Sometimes I ask
myself what is the worst thing that
could possibly happen, and then relax
into the comparative grace of what is
actually going on. I seek to recognize
the many masks and mirrors of my ego. I
ask myself how much of my experience is
based on traumas from the past or fears
of the future. I look towards the big
picture, what’s really happening behind
the illusions of the separate ego. I
take the opportunity to deeply examine
my personal shadows, all of which I
realize are coming to the surface to be
healed. I ask myself if my faith in the
divine plan is truly unconditional, or
if it only works when things are
seemingly going well. I look for the
attachments I must give up. I look for
the gifts I must reclaim.
All these things help. But, by
themselves, they are not enough. The
purpose of the Second Wave is not to
struggle to find a way out. The purpose
of the Second Wave is simply to be
pounded into the sand until there is
nothing left to do anymore. The purpose
of the Second Wave is to shred any
remaining attachments or identities held
by the separate ego, including what we
might call our ‘spiritual ego’.
The Third Wave inevitably comes. The
stronger the First Wave has been the
stronger also the Second Wave can be.
The more consciously we can go through
the Second Wave, the more permanent the
Third Wave will be. In context of
receiving the “deeksha”, if the First
Wave is Enlightenment, then the Second
Wave is Endarkenment, and the Third Wave
is a state of Oneness which is neither
dark nor light, and beyond the
distinction of either dark or light.
This is where the “fire” from heaven has
burned away the last remnants of
separateness. This is where we
experience our true face, which has
nothing to do with the face we have
learned to recognize in the daily
mirrors of life. This is the territory
Jesus wrestled with in the wilderness of
his soul before he could fully embody
the energies of the Christ.
I sense that the Three Waves which
each of us will be going through in this
passage towards Oneness are the same
Waves that collective humanity will be
going through. It is also the same
Waves that an organization like the
Golden Age Foundation or any movement
that ultimately still has roots within
the mass consciousness of humanity will
also have to go through. It is the same
Waves that our beloved Earth is going
through as She prepares to birth
humanity and all life into a Golden Age.
Despite appearances, there is a huge
omnipotent, loving Intelligence that is
working through all of this.
It seems to me that perhaps we are
now collectively entering the Second
Wave. From all the feedback I seem to
be receiving from people, it may be that
something is coming to a head on a
planetary level, like a big collective
event about to happen. What this would
look like I do not know and cannot say.
But it is important for us to recognize
that the grace of the Third Wave which
is also pouring into the Earth today is
beyond all temporal forms and can never
be diminished or held back by anything.
Sri Aurobindo, the great mystic sage
of India, referred to the Second Wave as
the “supramental catastrophe”, and noted
that there would inevitably be a period
of transition where all our collective
shadows would surface. My sense is that
this is about to peak on our planet in
these coming months and years. Yet he
also stated that this would be followed
by the “supramental manifestation”,
identical to what Sri Bhagavan refers to
the as the dawning of the Golden Age.
So if we are experiencing the Second
Wave at this time, let us remember the
big picture. No matter what stage of the
process we are going through, the gift
is alive in us, and we are blessed with
the capability to pass it on and on and
on. If we stay in state of transparency
with all this, and allow the winds of
the destroyer to blow through us without
resistance, we shall come out the other
side of this in a much deepened capacity
to serve the One.
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